Grief Virus

I pause in silence. Honoring the fallen that still forge this ground with mystery and memory.  Your vacancy leaves stains permanent and pressing. Questioning – even the questions to ask.

Undoubtedly I doubt my ability to heal, to offer healing – to rise as the correct antidote to this grief virus. It spreads and lingers indefinitely.

The responsibility of maintaining your legacy is a burden I struggle to bear.  I force movements in baby steps. It feels like I need to learn to walk and talk all over again.  All the normal that surrounded me falls deep in yesterdays cavern and refuses to budge.  I don’t ever want to forget you for one moment of my life (her life – his life), now left without you. All the mist that surrounds me in your honor I preserve in buckets – to pass on to every aching body that allows.

Is it enough?

Will the liquid that flows and the rivers that run in your name, ever be enough?

How can I separate the stones to smooth out the good from the bad?

I need for all whispers of you to be only of your glory.  The life you gave, the hope you ensued, the hands that comforted – the dreams you inspired. This I pray for your children and for your children’s children.  So that their memory too, will sing only the songs of joy.

Tragedy’s Room

Today I want to put skin around my words
Turn sentences into limbs
And reach across the seas
Finding my way to your door

My blankets of consoling will never do this moment justice
History has been broken
A tear in life’s time table
“Why” lingers at the footsteps you watched from birth
Hands by your side that can’t seem to bring enough healing

This time

Trouble feels so beyond
What you can mend

Warmth can roam
Beyond our flesh
Far past aching bone
It will make its way back
Where darkness looms
Where loss and heartbreak

Now claim this room

Bows break future moments
Pausing time
Covering moons
Lingering in our present
Floating in the in-between

But hands do breathe volumes
When crashing into tragedies door
Look now and know
What strength they hold
Your grip
Your reach

Barriers breaking as we speak

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About jessicakristie

Publisher and Soulsfhift Mentor
This entry was posted in Flashes of Life, Poetry and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

16 Responses to Grief Virus

  1. JD says:

    You’ve infected me.

    Somehow with…..
    the antidote?

    What a poignant and heart touching eulogy.

    The level of depth and understanding are amazingly conveted to the reader.

    I’ll be reading this more than a few times.

  2. Sometimes I have to break my own heart to write, but it always feels better in the end. Heavy stuff, I know…
    Thanks hon for reading and supporting. I am happy to share and always feel grateful even if just one person connects with it. ♥

  3. Desert Rose says:

    Today I want to put skin around my words
    Turn sentences into limbs
    And reach across the seas
    Finding my way to your door

    OMG..Jessie! these lines are so perfect!you just touched me with all power there is,i feel your words rising in my mind.SPECTACULAR poem,amazing writing..you are just incredibly beautiful sweetheart!i definitely enjoy reading you so much..:)
    tight hugs 🙂

  4. JTW says:

    there’s so much here to take in. you’re a true artist and i feel like every post just gets better & better.

    xo

  5. This post made me sad but the words were lovely. Sounds like someone is very missed.

  6. Jay Schryer says:

    This is incredibly beautiful, and incredibly sad. I feel like you’ve reached into my chest and caressed my heart.

  7. Libithina says:

    Extraordinary Jess xxx ~ was only just discussing the importance of retaining and passing on legacy of those that have graced and shaped needing ‘for all whispers of you to be only of your glory (loved this). The life you gave, the hope you ensued, the hands that comforted – the dreams you inspired’ to sing their ‘songs of joy’.. ‘All the normal that surrounded me falls deep in yesterdays cavern’ Yes! ‘I don’t ever want to forget you for one moment of my life’ learning to ‘walk and talk again’ in ‘babysteps’ ~ so so true ~ and the tiniest, gentlest of these ~ as the grief virus’ lingers ‘responsibility of maintaining your legacy’ determines to share ~ those ‘songs of joy’ ~ shaping fabrics that were weaved before ~ continuum in legacy ~
    losing my dearly loved Father this year who also was a much beloved Grandfather (and my Mum in law) ~ this really spoke to my heart Jess x x x

    • I am so glad I could represent your feelings well. Sometimes just expressing helps the healing come a bit quicker. I am so sorry for your tough year. Loss is never easy. Much love sweet friend. ♥

  8. 1MereMortal says:

    Deeply felt…beautifully written…thank you for sharing.

  9. Pingback: Recycling 2010 « Jessica Kristie

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